Post by Admin on Nov 28, 2016 23:19:35 GMT -8
Excerpts from her book 'Celebrity Run-In's, Kathy spills over 150 celebrity experiences Here are just a few.
Harry Styles
She [Kathy] seems quite fond of Harry Styles. Harry Styles wasn’t at all a prick to Kathy, he just… kinda embarrassed himself. Kathy was seated next to Harry at an Eagles concert. She went backstage after the show and was hanging out with her friends, Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson. While she and Tom were talking, Harry, who was “allegedly very, very wasted” came into the room and immediately approached Tom. Here’s the excerpt:
Harry: Re-membah when you wuz savin’ Private Ryan and had to bring ‘im back to ‘is mum? Re-membah?
Tom Hanks: Yes.
Harry: Re-membah when you wuz in Cappin Phillips? And the other guy sez, “Oim’ the capn’ now”? ‘Membah?
Tom: Yes, yes, I do remember.
Harry: Was that scaarrry?
Tom: Harry, have you met my friend, the comedian Kathy Griffin? (Tom really hit the word comedian hard.)
Harry: Yeah…am I gonna be in one of your skits?
Harry: Re-membah when you wuz Forrest Gump? ‘Membah? ‘Membah?
Tom: I was, yes.
Harry: You wuz always runnin’? Membah?
Harry: That was a good film.
Tom: I do remember.
Without explanation, Harry Styles turned and pivoted away. Tom Hanks had been pretty much frozen in the same sport during this magical and epic exchange. Tom’s answer was perfect and delivered very dryly:
Tom: Sometimes, I just want to drive them to rehab myself."
Anna Kendrick
“I’m sure this was an isolated incident,” Griffin writes of her encounter with Kendrick, now 31, in 2011. “Or at least I'd like to think it was.”
At a Toronto Film Festival event, the Pitch Perfect star was seated at a booth near Griffin. The comedian recalls walking up, saying hi and then complimenting the actress on Up in the Air, which earned her an Oscar nomination for best supporting actress. “Really simple chitchatting, maybe thirty seconds,” she writes. “Then there was a pause, and since I'm not afraid of pauses in conversation, I just kept talking. Then she looked at me and very unabashedly said, ‘Um, I have to ask you to go. My cousin's here visiting, and we need to catch up.’”
Griffin was caught off guard — and thrown off her game. “Seriously, if there had been a security guard in the vicinity, I wouldn't have been surprised if Kendrick had snapped her fingers to him and had me forcibly escorted away,” she admits. “It was that weird and, to my mind, rude.”
Woody Allen
In November 2014, Allen walked into a dinner party with adopted daughter turned wife Soon-Yi, more than 30 years his junior. “He announced, ‘I’m Woody, and this is my child bride!’” admits Griffin. “The bitter truth was that his child bride remark would be his opening and closing joke.”
But she did learn an important fact: The father of five has seen every episode of Disney’s Hannah Montana. “Not only that,” writes a shocked Griffin, “He continued by expressing his concern about what had happened to Miley [Cyrus]regarding her ‘current rebellious phase.’”
As a joke, I told Woody, ‘I guess the reason you wanted to sit next to me was to hear all the Miley [Cyrus] gossip. ‘I’ve never missed an episode of “Hannah Montana,” said Woody. I was in shock. I understood when, two months later, he cast her in that new Amazon series [‘Crisis in Six Scenes.”]
Leonard DiCaprio
she tried to grab his attention. “I stood up and said, ‘Don't be a douchebag, Leo. Get off your f--ing phone and say hi to the great Lily Tomlin!’” she recalls. “He either didn't hear me or chose to ignore me. You decide. I repeated it until he finally turned his head, pulled his precious phone away, and kindly said hello to Lily. (He's gorgeous by the way.)”
From there, she continued to egg him on. “I said again, ‘Jesus, Leo, don't be such a douchebag,’” Griffin recalls. “He walked away and with an adorable smile said, ‘I am a douchebag.’ Touché, Leo.”
Christina Aguilera (Haha! Literally no one likes her!)
"My first encounter with Christina Aguilera was so ridiculous it wasn’t funny. She was as arrogant as could be — just so snooty. But now it’s just crazy... She will come up to me and give me a kiss on the cheek and ask me how I’m doing. A big difference from those old days when she’d take one look at me and go, ‘Ugh!’ and turn away.”
Ashton Kutcher
Kutcher refused to speak to her at a charity event after she made this joke: "Ashton Kutcher released a statement saying marriage is one of the most difficult things in the world. Really? I would say fighting cancer is." The two hosted the charity event TOGETHER.
Demi Lovato
She denounces bullying but incites her fans to bully other celebrities.
"The Lovatics were printing pictures of my home, where I go for a walk every day ... They really went for it," she said. "But let me tell you what I learned from the Demi Lovato experience, and I'm not saying it was a good lesson. It really taught me, 'Oh no! Now I'm going harder.'"
Jon Hamm
“He proceeded to get very drunk during the coffee table portion, and then when it came for dinner, Sue had sat him next to me,” she says.
During a conversation with Nicholson, Hamm interrupted with “boozy yammering.”
“First it was, ‘You know your Emmy isn’t a real Emmy,'” Griffin claims. “I let that one go, but then he whispered, ‘You’re so o-o-o-old.'”
Never one to take an insult, she says she snapped back: “You can’t keep up. You’re outclassed. Now zip it; Jack’s talking!”
He’s one of these hot guys who’s mildly funny but actually thinks he’s comedian level funny,” she writes. “You know the type — there’s probably one in your office or family. He just reeks of that. It’s an entitled air. When Hammy wants to be funny, he’s, well, not.” Burn.
Kim Kardashian
"We live next door to each other," Griffin told us in a sit-down at Mama Shelter Hollywood, revealing that she spoke to Kardashian after her terrifying Paris robbery. "She's doing fine. The last thing Kim Kardashian actually said to me was -- because I warned her, 'Just so you know, we might get along but you're never out of the act' -- and she's just like, 'I get it. It's an honor.' I was like, 'Good girl.'" She's a quiet, respectful neighbour.
"We live next door to each other," Griffin told us in a sit-down at Mama Shelter Hollywood, revealing that she spoke to Kardashian after her terrifying Paris robbery. "She's doing fine. The last thing Kim Kardashian actually said to me was -- because I warned her, 'Just so you know, we might get along but you're never out of the act' -- and she's just like, 'I get it. It's an honor.' I was like, 'Good girl.'" She's a quiet, respectful neighbour.
Ellen DeGeneres
“I’m almost positive a certain beloved daytime talk show host once had me kicked out of a backstage dressing room at the Emmy Awards,” writes the comedian. “I can’t prove it, but this person, who has short blonde hair, has a mean streak that all of Hollywood knows about. She also claims this 'day-time talk show host has her banned from her show.
Donald Trump
I’ll never forget one specific day I spent with The Donald at one of his stupid golf courses that none of his supporters could afford to play at. I spent the day with him and Liza Minnelli, and it was a challenge. It was so insane. Here was Donald driving the golf cart and me and Liza in the back — and she kept getting the spins, but, of course, he didn’t pay any attention.
“I’m probably one of the very few people in the world who can say I spent the day with The Donald and The Liza. Back then, he was driving the golf cart. Now, he’s driving the country. I should have stopped him then.”
Cher
“It’s weird that I’m friends with Cher,” Griffin says. “Of course, let’s face it, we’re two gay guys in women’s bodies. But what I like about her — and she’s obviously very eccentric — is the fact she’s very genuine.
Goopy
When it comes to Paltrow, I think about it based on the advice I got from my dear, departed friend Joan Rivers and my still good friend Don Rickles about how established stars react to people like me they think are really on the ‘D list.’
Every time I’ve seen her, I’ve tried. I’ve done things like giving her an autographed 8-by-10 photo of myself to try to make her laugh. No luck. But about a year ago, I went up to her at a party and said, ‘Paltrow, your night’s made now that I’m here, right?’ And she said, ‘It kind of is!’
“So the Paltrow story in the book is about years of trying get her to accept me. It’s not like she’s now in love with me, but she finally realizes, ‘OK, I get it. This bitch hasn’t quit after all these years. She’s not going anywhere.'”
Random tidbits
Will Ferrell is too famous to talk to her anymore
Jane Fonda made Kathy "the worst quesadilla of [her] life."
Anderson Cooper: "I love to subject him to what I call emotional waterboarding — always bringing up ‘The Mole’ and his catalogue modeling days.... We just clicked from when we first met. It’s one of those magical, crazy things. But it works."
